Monday, August 23, 2004

Apparently Viagra Works

Thanks for the Memory to Ace of Spades HQ.

According to this article from NewsMax:

(my interpretation in italics)

Dole Defends Swiftees in Call From Kerry

Bob Dole gives John Kerry the mother of all pimp-slaps

Presidential candidate John Kerry telephoned former Sen. Bob Dole this morning to complain about Dole's demand a day earlier that he apologize to Vietnam veterans for protesting the war, the one-time Republican presidential candidate revealed Monday afternoon.

Presidential candidate John Kerry telephoned former Sen. Bob Dole this morning to whine about something that Dole has no control over, a recurrign theme for the Kerry campaign.

"John Kerry called me this morning, which surprised me," Dole told radio host Sean Hannity.

"I can't believe he had the chutzpah to complain to me," Dole told radio host Sean Hannity.

"He said he was very disappointed, we'd been friends. I said John, we're still friends, but [the Swiftvets] have First Amendment rights, just as your people have First Amendment rights.

"I said John, what's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander. You brought it on yourself, now suck it up and be a man!"

Dole told Kerry, "I'm not trying to stir anything up, but I don't believe every one of these people who have talked about what happened are Republican liars.

"Sucks that people who know just what a weasel you are are finally singing, huh?"

"And very frankly, Bush is my guy, and I'm tired of people on your side calling him everything from a coward to a traitor to everything - a deserter."

"When you start slinging mud, you're bound to get some on yourself, jerk"

Dole said he urged Kerry, "Why don't you call George Bush today and say, 'Mr. President, let's stop all this stuff about the National Guard and Vietnam - and let's talk about the issues."

"Why don't you admit that you don't have a platform to run on, and all you have going for you is 'I served in Viet Nam'?"

Dole said Kerry responded, "I haven't spent one dime attacking President Bush."

But the Republican war hero shot back, "You don't have to. You've got all the so-called mainstream media, plus you've got MoveOn.org and all these other groups that have spent millions and millions of dollars trying to tarnish Bush's image."

"Don't tell me you don't know what some of these people are doing," he told Kerry.

"You're not only a hypocrite, John, you're an idiot if you think we can't all see right through it."

"Everybody likes quiet heroes," Dole added, saying he told Kerry, "John, everybody knows you were in Vietnam and the less you say about it, the better."

"If you're gonna remind us every 5 minutes that you served in Viet Nam, it's gonna come back to bite you on the butt."

Dole said he tried to end the tense conversation cordially by telling Kerry, "I wish you good luck, up to a point."

"But hey, don't feel bad, you still have a career as TerAYsuh's gigolo after this is all over."

-- end of article --

In other words, Bob Dole had the chance to say to John Kerry what every truth-loving American has wanted to, TO HIS FACE, and Bob Dole not only stepped up to the plate, he belted one over the center field fence.

Bravo, Mr. Dole.

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